Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.

Mat 6:34 Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.


Php 4:8 Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.


It's not easy giving up the habit of thinking for others, not when you've spent most of your life doing so. And it's not the thinking for others that might be construed as being a good thing. Believing others are thinking well of you, well... that is a good thing right? It makes a person feel happy to think others are thinking good things of them, holding them in 'high esteem' or even in 'esteem' that isn't quite so high. How often do people do that though, as a rule, believe others are thinking good things of them? It could happen a lot more than I imagine it happen simply because I fall far down the opposite side of that particular coin. I've made a habit of believing everybody thinks bad things of me, everybody holds me in 'low esteem' or 'very low esteem'. People talk about having self-esteem where we think good of ourselves. Then label people as having low self-esteem or high self-esteem. Of course a lot of low self-esteemers think that to hold themselves in high esteem is to be prideful and that's wrong, right? Do you think it's possible to have no esteem? Neither high nor low, but simply no concern over the self? Sure, some will say this or that person has 'no' self-esteem and what they mean is they think very, very low of themselves, so technically they have esteem for themselves it's just far down on the low side. If they truly had no self-esteem they wouldn't be thinking badly of themselves or good of themselves, right?


People like me, for I can only speak for myself really, who have LOW self-esteem often believe no others can think good of them, they can't be held in high esteem by others simply because the bad parts of them outweigh the good by far- yeah, that's low self-esteem. Have you ever been told what another thinks of you? The old- 'I thought you were...but you're not.' Have you ever told someone else that? 'I thought you were better than that? I thought you were different, better. I thought you were...' It doesn't matter really does it, because knowing another is telling you that they thought you were 'better' than what you apparantly are, hurts. If one person thinks that way then others have to do the same and frankly you believe it yourself, that some how some way you're not quite as good as you should be. Low self-esteem can be born that way.


It's so easy for me to imagine others thinking. I like to think for them you see. I imagine (and I do have a vivid imagination) that others think a lot of bad things about me. Those closest to me I tend to believe think the worst of me. In my liking to think for others I imagine their thoughts are consistently wishing I was different, better than I am. No one can really accept me for me and I don't even accept me for me because I've failed so many expectations I had for myself.


Recently I started to think for others as I always do and my thoughts were making me more and more depressed. I'd tell myself my thoughts for what they were thinking were true- that their actions past and present confirm it to be so. I tell myself not to be delusional and believe they are thinking differently because the past has shown that NOT to be true. Such a vile trap you know, all caught up in the reality and the supposed reality of thoughts. The lines are so blurred there is no telling where they really are and the confusing is as depressing as the thoughts. Part of me doesn't want to know the REAL thoughts because taking them out of my own mind and confirming them would hurt even more. Yet there is torture in thinking, in believing what is thought even if there is no way of knowing except by confirmation.


Does this all sound confusing, well I'm not surprised, it is confusing. I've been nudged by this thought though- Stop thinking for others. Just stop.


When I fill the heads of others with thier supposed bad thoughts whether true or not, I'm thinking for them. We are told in the Bible what things to think on... and rightly so.


Php 4:8 Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.


True things.
Honest things.
Just things.
Pure things.
Lovely things.
Things of good report.
Virtuous things.
Praise worthy things.


No where in there are we told to think of bad things, to imagine being thought of badly- a bad thing. So what if it's true. So what if someone you love thinks you're a bumbling idiot most of the time, you are NOT supposed to think on that because that isn't a good thing. Yes, it said to think on true things, but ---


The greek word used there for true--
ale?the?s
al-ay-thace'
From G1 (as a negative particle) and G2990; true (as not concealing): - true, truly, truth.


Whose truth are we to think on?


Joh 14:6 Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.


Jesus is the truth and through Jesus, through His righteousness as we claim it, we may be bumbling idiots to others but to God we are sons and daughters of merit. Christ's redeemed and that's the truth. What God thinks of us means more than what any other person on earth thinks. This is truth.


We are to think on true things in Jesus. Honest, just, pure, lovely, good reports, virtuous, and praiseworthy thoughts. We are not told to think on anything negative, anything bad, anything depressing.


Yes, the Bible says this--

Php 2:3 Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves.


We are to esteem others better than ourselves, we are to do things in lowliness of mind, and those of us who have very LOW self-esteem find it easy to esteem everyone better than ourselves but that's not what this is talking about, not really. Let's read it in context--


Php 2:1 If there be therefore any consolation in Christ, if any comfort of love, if any fellowship of the Spirit, if any bowels and mercies,
Php 2:2 Fulfil ye my joy, that ye be likeminded, having the same love, being of one accord, of one mind.
Php 2:3 Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves.
Php 2:4 Look not every man on his own things, but every man also on the things of others.
Php 2:5 Let this mind be in you, which was also in Christ Jesus:
Php 2:6 Who, being in the form of God, thought it not robbery to be equal with God:
Php 2:7 But made himself of no reputation, and took upon him the form of a servant, and was made in the likeness of men:
Php 2:8 And being found in fashion as a man, he humbled himself, and became obedient unto death, even the death of the cross.


When we think others are thinking bad of us there is little love there, little joy. We are caught up in SELF. We aren't thinking of the other person we are thinking FOR the other person and in truth, no matter how well you think you know someone you can't THINK for them, you just can't. When we dwell on our own thoughts of what others are thinking we are being very selfish and yes, we are esteeming ourselves above them but even thinking they are thinking on us. Sure, our thoughts my be negative and all, we might believe that others are better than we are, but in a way that depresses us and leaves us wishing we were better than what we are. This isn't what is meant at all. Esteeming another above ourselves is not putting ourselves down. Jesus did not downgrade Himself while esteeming others. Jesus took on the servant form of flesh and taught His followers to love others as He loves them putting their welfare first. We should, if we are truly esteeming others above ourselves, not think they are thinking badly but that their thoughts are their own to have and to be accountable for and hopefully, prayfully they are thoughts that are good thoughts.


I've rambled on lots today but it's been a rough week. I hope and pray for the faith I need to hold fast. The enemy assaults us on all sides and if he can turn us against ourselves he's as victorious as if he's trapped us in some other way. He doesn't care how he gets us, he'll stoop as low as he can, as deceptively as he can. I thank God through Jesus Christ that we are victorious in our Lord and Savior's righteousness, forgiven by Him, and called to be His now and forever. By His grace, by His love. In the Holy Spirit's guidance and comfort.


Amen.