Can we all agree that there is no such thing on
this earth as having a perfect life? We have expectations of how life should
be, how we imagine a perfect life will be, but isn't. We tell ourselves if only
this would change, or if I had that, and maybe if this wasn't how I was born-
life would be much better. Why couldn't I have that look, or be born with those
genes, and into that seemingly idyllic family. We will never have a perfect
life. Nothing will ever give us a perfect life. There isn't a single person
alive today that has had a perfect life.
We are perceived by others as being odd, and to
their way of thinking we may be odd. We are perceived by MOST others as being
odd, and to all their way of thinking we may be odd. We are perceived by
EVERYONE as being odd, and to everyone's thinking we may be odd. To ourselves
we just are. We didn't set out to be odd to anyone. We didn't set out to be
different from the majority acceptable norm. We turned out this way because
individuality exists.
I'm not the smartest person, I don't have the
best common sense, I'm not the prettiest person, I don't have the best body
shape (even thin as a board should thinnest be a criteria for best body). I
don't have the best hair- not even close. My skin is awful with moles,
freckles, age spots, wrinkles and various imperfections too numerous to account
for. By all accounts based on every single one of these things just mentioned,
I am a huge mess of a human being.
Some of the mess is my own doing, but a lot of
it is not. I can't with thinking change a single thing about myself. Externally
and internally I am filled with flaws that make people say-
I can't believe you didn't (insert what I
didn't do here). I can't believe you thought (insert weird thinking I do here).
I wish you would have (insert the many wishes I've left unfilled). Why couldn't
you (insert what I couldn't do here). Shouldn't you be (insert what I should be
instead). If you'd only do this (insert thing I should do) then you'd be
different. Stop obsessing over (insert obsessiveness here). How could you think
that (insert odd thoughts). Do you know you made me feel like I can't (insert
how I obstructed feelings). Because you reacted this way (insert my not good
reaction here) I can't be myself around you. With your believing (insert my
beliefs) I have to watch what I say around you. This list goes on and on and
on… and on… and on…….. Yes, and on. Even in my bubble wrapped world of
immediate family I often end up the really odd one.
What am I left to believe? The beliefs of what
so many say or something else?
The beliefs of so many, I have to believe that.
The majority rules after all.
So to be able to live with myself I call myself
eccentric and somehow that helps a little bit . It makes me sound okay in my
extremely flawed state of being. Don't mind me, I'm just very eccentric. Nice
way of saying, yeah, I know I'm weird but, hey, it's okay.
If this is your story too, don't be surprised-
we are all strange to each other and some accept the others strangeness without
pointing it out, while others can't help but point it out- it makes them
somehow feel good about themselves.
I can let what others think destroy me, or I
can accept myself and the realization that until my Savior returns and changes
my vile, corruptible, flawed body and mind- I will be what I am- completely and
utterly imperfect, and only growing more so over time hitting me with the 'you
are aging really badly' stick. I can let Christ be the perfection I need in me,
not me be perfect. I'm not perfect I'm the misshaped, oddball, who stands out
even among a world of oddballs- but Christ in me is perfect.
Joh_14:27 Peace I leave with you, my peace I
give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be
troubled, neither let it be afraid.
Joh_15:18 If the world hate you, ye know that
it hated me before it hated you.
Joh_15:19 If ye were of the world, the world
would love his own: but because ye are not of the world, but I have chosen you
out of the world, therefore the world hateth you.
Joh_16:33 These things I have spoken unto you,
that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be
of good cheer; I have overcome the world.
Joh_17:14 I have given them thy word; and the
world hath hated them, because they are not of the world, even as I am not of
the world.
Joh_17:15 I pray not that thou shouldest take
them out of the world, but that thou shouldest keep them from the evil.
Joh_17:16 They are not of the world, even as I
am not of the world.
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