Christ- My Hope.

Luk 18:13 … God be merciful to me a sinner. 

The revelation of having played a part in the horrors of another's life is heartbreaking. However inadvertently, however unintentional, the mere fact a failing in yourself created heartbreak and emotional, mental anguish that will  never go away for someone is awful. Actually, it's beyond awful, I don't think words exists for the awfulness it truly is.

Throughout life there are many wrongs done to others, many wrongs we do ourselves and the bottom line truly is- Satan wants to destroy us in any way he possibly can and will stop at nothing to do so. He will exploit every weakness we may possess even the tiniest flaw will open us to his manipulation. He's been manipulating humans from the beginning and knows every single thing he can do to get us to a place of despair, a place of apathy, a place of anger and hurt. Once we are safely tucked into our despair and allow Satan to rule our lives, he keeps his eye on us and will constantly update his strategies. Satan does not want us to be free of guilt. Satan wants guilt to eat away at us. Satan wants the unjust wrongs committed against us to be enough to blind us to any true love found in Christ. Satan wants anger alive in us being fed off the memories of the pain and he will remind us often of that pain, magnifying it constantly. Satan does not want us to be free from guilt and he will use our past failures against us. Satan does not want us to be free from our comfortable robes of self-righteousness, of self-justification. Satan wants to cripple us as either victims or criminals, he has both scenarios locked down tight and uses them all the time, and sometimes he will use both, often he will use both on the same person.  You are guilty, he shouts all the while whispering, you're only guilty because you were unjustly victimized yourself. This vicious circle of Satan's is alive and well- living in many people. Don't get me wrong, I know there is more than one vicious circle, he has millions and millions of them each tailor made for us individually.

I am…

Victim.

Criminal.

Hurt.

Hurt Inflictor. 

Guiltless.

Guilty.

Not condemned.

Condemned.

I'm all of these things.

Forgiving.

Forgiven.

I need to forgive and all that means. When I forgive it never makes the wrong right. When Jesus forgives us it doesn't make our past actions right, it acknowledges the past actions are wrong but allows us to still be loved.  The power of salvation will ultimately be the power of Christ's sinless sacrifice creating a new heart, a new life, a new me- in spite of all the sins of my past. This is the power of God, a power God would have us comprehend as fully as we can in our relationship with others. As victims we are asked to forgive as He forgives. As criminals we are asked to seek forgiveness, repenting of our sins depending solely on Christ to forgive us.

I'm guilty, I've failed in many ways. I've been the cause of pain for others. I can't go back in time and change things, I can only pray unendingly that God heals those I've had a hand in hurting-intentional or not. I can only trust that God will use all things for good towards the end of salvation in Christ, our eternal hope. I can only look forward to the new world, a world without sin and all its many horrors. I can only pray and hope that all the victims of my sins are in God's safekeeping, that they will belong to Him and His love and live with Christ always in eternity, rising to meet the Lord in the air upon His return. I hope… my hope is Christ, Christ who alone has DEFEATED Satan.

Php 3:12  Not as though I had already attained, either were already perfect: but I follow after, if that I may apprehend that for which also I am apprehended of Christ Jesus. 

Php 3:13  Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, 

Php 3:14  I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus. 

Php 3:15  Let us therefore, as many as be perfect, be thus minded: and if in any thing ye be otherwise minded, God shall reveal even this unto you. 

Php 3:16  Nevertheless, whereto we have already attained, let us walk by the same rule, let us mind the same thing. 

Php 3:17  Brethren, be followers together of me, and mark them which walk so as ye have us for an ensample. 

Php 3:18  (For many walk, of whom I have told you often, and now tell you even weeping, that they are the enemies of the cross of Christ: 

Php 3:19  Whose end is destruction, whose God is their belly, and whose glory is in their shame, who mind earthly things.) 

Php 3:20  For our conversation is in heaven; from whence also we look for the Saviour, the Lord Jesus Christ: 

Php 3:21  Who shall change our vile body, that it may be fashioned like unto his glorious body, according to the working whereby he is able even to subdue all things unto himself.