He died, I weep, I mourn, and when I dared to laugh the sound was harsh to my mourning. My mourning screamed against the audacity of my laughter, berating me instantly. How dare you laugh, don't you know that sound is not allowed! Howl out your pain, scream out your grief, but don't you dare laugh! And yet…
I am told…
It's okay to laugh, He would want you to laugh.
So why is my time of weeping and mourning fighting against the time of laughing?
I know, I know… that times intertwine, twisting and turning within each other. Times war against one another, not enemies, not really, but each needing to have its say in …its… time. My mourning joins with weeping, and laughter pokes its head inside the two of them in order to gauge the weather. My storm of grief screams at it to get out! And laughter recedes, for now, even as it nudges smiles to enter first. A small smile slips in between the tears and heart pain, and it's allowed to remain for such a short moment before mourning growls at it, and weeping washes it away. The next time maybe smiles will be allowed to linger, as laughter waits in the darkened wings, waiting for its time.
Ecc 3:1 To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:
Ecc 3:2 A time to be born, and a time to die…
Ecc 3:4 A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn…
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